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[botias]

I used to believe in 'mature relationships'. True, I had encountered them only in fiction, but what the heck. It seemed reasonable. I've long been getting reports from the front, however. Disturbing and disheartening reports. It seems that these mutual stroke-fests where people tend to one another's egos and sore backs and gonads in perfect respect and harmony, living their own full lives, feeling nothing beyond great warmth and affection, parting fondly as happy destiny sweeps them down different paths... well, apparently they just don't much exist. At least not for long. It seems that people are changable beasts, and generally either become more or less fond of a person over time, if they have much interaction. Most folks are dreadfully prone to forming attachments and habits in any case, especially to those in the general vicinity of which they experience orgasms. Sooner or later apparently, usually sooner, one party is going to fall in love or out of like, and it all goes down the tubes. *Sigh* I suppose I ought to have made the connection between the likelihood of such relationships and the quantity of mature, enlightened, emotionally and financially independant individuals available to form them. Another illusion shattered. Next week: Vaginal Orgasms and Santa Claus (just kidding, I can't recall believing in either)

Comments

[elynne.livejournal.com]

Dunno... I think what you have with Alan and I have with Myles is about as good as it gets. Also, with the whole poly thing, I don't nessecarily see falling in love with somebody else as being a problem with an existing mature relationship. Hell, I had plenty of crushes on other people when Myles and I were monogamous - I just didn't do anything about it, and they went away. I could still be doing that, but it's much more interesting to at least entertain the idea that I could possibly do something about the crushes. Doesn't mean I have to, or want to - but the possibility is there.

You can feel free to disbelieve in my vaginal orgasms all you like. ;) I'm just one of those few lucky girls with an "innie" rather than an "outie".

[botias.livejournal.com]

Ya caught me talking out of my ass. *blushing* I do believe in vaginal orgasms. :) To be honest, I didn't really figure out how to operate my clitoris until a shamefully late age, long past the time that Alan had had it out of the box and completely figured out. I was mostly referring to the way early sex researchers/psychologists used to theorize that they were the only 'mature' orgasm. Dorks. :)

Odd as it may seem, I wasn't classifying Alan/Myles type relationships as
'mature'. It probably needs some background. 'Mature relationship' has been one of Alan and my's earliest running jokes based on relationships that I would hear about from his guy fiction. Instead of enjoying one another, and happily moving on when one or the other received a promotion and new assignment to the planet Xenon, we insisted on getting all sappy and melodramatic and teenagery and stuff. By 'falling in love' throwing a spanner in the works, I meant one person with the other, not with a third, which clearly need not particularly ruffle the 'mature' relationship, (Disclaimer: so long the folks were/became poly, and time and energy dedicated to the new relationship was apportioned mostly from other activities in the person's life).

When you and Josh were still in NRE, in my silly naivete, I thought "Wow, here it is at last, the 'mature relationship'. She found a fun boy-toy with which to celebrate her resurrected libido and enjoy NRE, she gets her love and commitment at home, and everyone's cool. Ah, there's the life." Later I was to discover that you expected more from a beau than nimble appendages/appliances, a flirtatious nature and cable TV. (Go figure.)

[elynne.livejournal.com]

Ooooooh. I had a feeling that you were writing about something else that I wasn't getting. :]

Later I was to discover that you expected more from a beau than nimble appendages/appliances, a flirtatious nature and cable TV. (Go figure.)

Yeah, funny how that works, isn't it? :P If that was all that had been advertised, I wouldn't have felt as cheated when it turned out that that was all I got, while his TWU WUV 4-EVARR got the Deluxe Package. Either that, or his TWU WUV 4-EVARR isn't as picky as I am. ;)

[botias.livejournal.com]

...I wouldn't have felt as cheated when it turned out that that was all I got, while his TWU WUV 4-EVARR got the Deluxe Package.

Don't you worry your pretty little head, my friend, I pretty much guarantee you she's his divine justice. }:D Shallow types like that are as capable of getting twitterpated as the rest of us, but it's always with someone more shallow and selfish and messed up than they are. (Folks with integrity, standards and stuff only end up turning these folks off and making them feel threatened and inadequate.) The planets are perfectly aligned for her to ditch him and make him feel like crap. But... we're much too enlightened to wish for such a thing... uh, aren't we? ;) Further, it's difficult for me to imagine that a relationship that developed within the relatively brief course of your own relationship with him has somehow got a firmer and more real foundation. It seems even more unlikely given the haste with which it was advancing. You can build an awful lot faster with clouds than with concrete. If Josh has a take-home lesson I would say it is that talk is cheap. I've always been suspicious of the flirty ones. Talk is cheap, but I'm nervous of it being used lightly for some reason.

[elynne.livejournal.com]

The planets are perfectly aligned for her to ditch him and make him feel like crap. But... we're much too enlightened to wish for such a thing... uh, aren't we? ;)

Don't bet on it... I've been having recurring fantasies about him "somehow accidentally" being set on fire. ;) Still, I think I'm getting (however slowly) to the point where I honestly believe that he will Get What's Coming To Him, and I don't feel quite so desperate to be there when it happens, if that makes sense. :]

Yeah... he's definitely a flirter, and I'm not used to them. Huh. More good thoughts from you, as always. Thank you. :) *careful around-the-baby hug* ;)

[botias.livejournal.com]

I've been having recurring fantasies about him "somehow accidentally" being set on fire...

Hee! I love it! Thanks for the laugh.