Amateur Pornography

[botias]

I've read a few 'fic language I cannot stand' posts and they are often very funny, but intimidating too as a writer. It's too easy to lump all the responses together into an imaginary population of easily-squicked uber-readers who wear a lot of white and who perhaps should not be reading amateur pornography at all, but rather a 'Best Erotica of 2007' anthology, or perhaps browsing a nice coffee table book of shunga.

With sex scenes one can go porny, clinical, arty, Harlequin or biblical. Alas, there is no word for the cock/penis/electric arc/manhood/loins which will not win scorn from someone. And now I go back to work on my next blue alien overlord love scene.

Comments

[mere-ubu.livejournal.com]

*whispers* I once did a search and replace to swap "dick" for "cock." It's just sexier. "Dick" is more like "asshat" to me. Not sexay!

[botias.livejournal.com]

'Dick' was the popular term when I was in elementary school, along with 'wiener'. I think perhaps it ruined it for me forever.

[mere-ubu.livejournal.com]

Yep. Like it's brother in lameness "dong," it evokes naught but the schoolyard for me.

[bendy1.livejournal.com]

Oh I love dick! I was like that about it for ages but then I read a Spander where Xander was 'great at dicking' and it changed and suddenly became hot.

Um... when I say I love dick...

[mere-ubu.livejournal.com]

Ah, don't we all. ;)

"Dicking" certainly has its place, and that place usually seems to be Spander. Hnnnh. I got no problems with it as a verb.

[bendy1.livejournal.com]

Xander's fanfiction penis is very talented! Mmm.. *wanders off to find old skool spander*

[mere-ubu.livejournal.com]

Hee! Upon further happy reflection on the collected works of Anna S., I'm prepared to say that I am Definitely Down with Dicking. *wanders off to Cafe Press to make t-shirt*

[botias.livejournal.com]

eh, when you have two boys together, elementary school terminology doesn't seem quite so inappropriate anymore maybe. :)

[devylish.livejournal.com]

well, and honestly... if you're a
Veronica Mars fan as I am....There's Dick Casablancas.... who refuses to be called Richard.

He knows he is a dick in the jerk sense of the word (hmmm there's innuendo there toooooo!)... AND he is proud of his 'dick' just embracing the word (and the love noodle) all around.

and hee hee... love noodle is a term my friends and i use lol.

[botias.livejournal.com]

Love noodle seems very sweet and affectionate. :)