Fic!Spike vs. Canon!Spike

[botias]

You're at the hospital with your sick mom.	Paces worriedly in his crypt.	Breaks into your house and steals your underwear.
About your friends…	Bonds with them as soon as they give him half a chance; the homicidal asshat thing is just a protective facade for a sensitive guy that really cares about people.	Fantasizes about you ditching the pathetic hangers-on and letting him show you what power is really for. What you see in them is a complete mystery.
On rape...	Not sporting, that; not his thing. Angelus on the other hand… *shakes head*	It takes all the fun out of it if they're already too weak to cry.
Oh no! Your ex-boyfriend catches you in bed with him!	His only thought is for you. Though chipped, he valiantly threatens your ex with bodily harm at the first hint of criticizing you. *much sexy growling and posturing*	Thinks the scenario is just delicious. He knows your ex is too honorable to stake him (wanker) and he takes full advantage, rubbing it in as deep as he can. Oh, are you still here?
You're deeply depressed and floundering…	Watches your back and delivers pithy vampire advice between exchanging worried looks with your friends. He can't help but hope your growing friendship will lead to something.	Is worried about you, doesn't want you to go offing yourself or anything. But what a priceless opportunity to get over on you at last and maybe even cut you loose from your loser friends.
To prove his love…	Gives up evil doin's of all sorts. Changing yourself to be what they want, even if it goes against your very nature, isn't that what love's about really? And he's always been love's bitch.	Betrays his ex-love and offers to stake her in front of you, but oh no, he'd never hurt YOU… much… just don't go dumping him the way she did.
You are in mortal peril!	Would navigate a flaming moat of holy water to save you.	Would navigate a flaming moat of holy water to save you. (dammit)
On slash...	"Me and Angel? And you want to film it? On one condition: that you strap one on and join in, baby. Men, women *shrug* all I care about is the person inside."	"Me?! A bloody poofter?! I don't even let other blokes in my car much less... Look, you all do what you want, I'm leaving before I go blind or something."

Comments

[botias.livejournal.com]

Sounds like slash when it's bad iz rly rly bad

Spike, my friend, eat the kittens don't be one.

[bendy1.livejournal.com]

Well to be fair het fic Spike does quite badly in the ego stakes too :) But slash Spike is easily shrunk :)

::pets him::

[botias.livejournal.com]

I have never read of six foot four het fic Spike crying himself to sleep in Buffy's arms.

[bendy1.livejournal.com]

Good lord, I have :)

Usually when she tells him she's pregnant. Or sometimes when he just can't cope with that soul. More than once... cover your eyes... it was because their lovemaking was so moving.

And Buffy didn't even laugh at him and then cry a little bit because her man was a girlyboy :)

[botias.livejournal.com]

LOL OMG tell me where to read wantzzz And here I thought I was an emo het!fic afficianado. Clearly I have much still to learn.